6 years ago today, I gave birth to my girls. Summer made it and Autumn died from a very rare very complicated birth defect - which included a whole in her heart, spine disorders, and basically everything that should have been inside her on the outside. I was doing fine with my grief and longing for Autumn until I heard this commercial about a week ago that described a drug that I took having a link to birth defects in babies. The side effects of this drug match everything that my daughter died from. I know that I took this drug in the early stages of my pregnancy and now I feel cheated.
I was on this site often trying to cope with the monotonic part of my pregnancy and had to grin and bear all of the negative comments from doctors about how most of the time both twins don't make it. I never in my wildest dreams thought that something I did or took would have caused the death of one of my girls. Now I feel more cheated that a drug may have caused my pain and loss. I can't seem to fight my anger and resentment.
How do I come back from that?